Ocean Banter
by Soapie 7
Summary: Draco and Hermione celebrate Valentine's Day, with some really bad puns on water by one Mr. Malfoy. Happy Valentine's Day! Dramione fluff!


******My Valentine's Day story. Really random and full of bad puns and Dramione fluff. Enjoy and review!**

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><p><strong>Ocean Banter.<strong>

"Draco, where are you taking me?" Hermione asked in an exasperated voice. It wasn't everyday where your Slytherin boyfriend broke into your Gryffindor common room, blindfolded you and led you away.

"Hermione, what day is it?"

"Tuesday." She answered, matter-of-factly.

"Silly 'Mione," He teased, "I meant the date."

"14th of February, why?" The brunette asked, clueless, before suddenly realizing, "Oh. I completely forgot it was Valentine's Day! I forgot to get you a gift and EVERYTHING!"

"Hermione, don't panic. Today isn't about gifts. Now, sit here…now." And he gently placed her on a chair. Hermione felt cool air on her shoulders, guessing she was either outside or in a drafty room of the castle.

"Can I take my blindfold off now?" The witch asked, halfway amused, halfway peeved.

"Yes." The blonde replied, smiling.

Carefully, she untied the fabric and peeled it off, revealing her bright hazel eyes and, too her, the view of a candlelit dinner, overlooking the black lake.

"Oh, Draco…" She said softly, looking around the magical, romantic scenery.

"It's beautiful. Nice touch on the self-playing string quartet by the way." She said, nodding her head over to the floating instruments, creating beautiful music on their own.

"Flitwick taught me a few extra things." The Pureblood gave a smug smirk, pouring Hermione a glass of mead.

"Well, thank-you Draco, for this extra-ordinary evening." The Muggle Born mumbled, leaning over the red and white table and placing a kiss on his lips.

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><p>After dinner, Hermione and Draco admired the view of the lake, with the sunset reflection making sparkles dance on the surface.<p>

"It's really beautiful. The water, I love it when the sunset hits it at the perfect time, making those amazing sparkles." Hermione mused.

"Aha." Draco said absentmindedly, feeling like the moment was beginning to get heavy, "What did the ocean say to the other ocean?"

Hermione gave her boyfriend a weird look. For someone who was second in class, he could really be a dumbass sometimes.

"Nothing," The silver-eyed boy smirked, "He just waved!"

"Oh, Merlin." The honey-eyed girl mumbled, rolling her eyes.

"_Sea _what I did there?" Draco sniggered. Hermione just continued to stare incredulously at him.

"_Sea-_riously, do you?" He pushed, obviously not letting go of the joke.

"Yes, Draco, darling, I get the awful joke."

"Are you…_shore_?" He continued.

"Draco, stop now, it's going too far now."

"No need to be a _beach_." He rolled his eyes in a jokey manner.

"Stop that. It's not even funny!" The brunette snapped, standing up.

"_Water _you saying?" He called as she stormed off, continuing with his joke just in case she was _also _joking.

Hermione stopped, before stropping back and, when she was up close to her boyfriend, she poked him hard in the chest.

"You're one more joke closer to being single." She threatened in a menacingly low voice.

Gulping loudly, Draco spoke up. "_Shell _I stop then?" His voice was shaky but he didn't let that stop him.

"That's it! I'm done!" Hermione cried dramatically, throwing her arms up in the air to emphasis the point before storming off.

"OK!" Draco hollered after her, "I'll guess I'll _krill _myself now!"

Hermione didn't even flinch, just kept on walking.

"No!" He cried out too her, genuinely worried, "I _fish _you, come back!"

She was off in the distance so he ran after her, "Hermione! Hermione!"

But she was gone, ignoring him.

"_Whale_, I guess you're not coming back!" He shouted.

"Hermione," He continued running, "Are you _tide _of these jokes? Because, I know, after a _whale _they get annoying. I think that's on _porpoise _though."

The Bookworm rolled her eyes and continued marching back to the castle.

"Hermione, I'm sorry. Really, I truly am!" Draco's voice was growing hoarse from the yelling as he caught up with her.

He tapped her on the shoulder, and she turned around with a glare.

"What did the volcano say to the other volcano?" He asked.

"Draco, I don't have time for your stupid jokes!" She protested.

"Just go with it. Please." He begged, his grey eyes begging.

With a heavy sigh, she decided to play along. "What?"

"I lava you." Draco mumbled, leaning in to kiss her but, she stopped him.

"Say it properly." She demanded.

"Say what?" He asked.

"You know what." She snapped, "Now say it. Properly, no silly puns."

"I…" He stammered, "I love you, Hermione Granger."

"I love you too, Draco Malfoy." The brunette said, leaning in to kiss the blonde, "Happy Valentine's Day." She breathed into his ear before their lips finally met.

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><p><strong>You can use this joke anytime on friends. I did this earlier to my friend. She's ignoring me now.<strong>

**Happy Valentine's Day. Love you all**

**- Panda x**


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